


Leave Your Lover

by giantpanda



Category: The Mindy Project
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Song Lyrics, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-21
Updated: 2014-07-21
Packaged: 2018-02-09 21:17:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1998153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giantpanda/pseuds/giantpanda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny's thoughts inspired by Sam Smith's song "Leave Your Lover."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Leave Your Lover

**Author's Note:**

> It has been a really long time since I have written anything. I wanted to start slowly back into writing after becoming obsessed with this show. Any feedback/criticism is welcomed.

_I don't have much to give, but I don't care for gold,  
_ _what use is money, when you need someone to hold?_  

He’s not sure when it happened. When tolerance turned to acceptance. Acceptance turned to need and want. When he stopped fighting her desire for friendship. When she became the first person he thought of when he had news to share. The person he thought of during the day or as he drifted off to sleep. When everything changed. When teasing her about the guys she dated became harder and harder. When the thought first crossed his mind, that maybe he was the man for her. He wished he knew when it all changed. He wished he could change it back.

_Don't have direction, I'm just rolling down this road,  
waiting for you to bring me in from out the cold._

He’s lost count of how many dates she’s had recently. Watched her face light up as she prepared for another dinner, another round of drinks, and another night with a man who wasn’t him. Listened as she talked non-stop about how this time she knew she had found the right guy for her, how this date would be different. Listened as she shared her vision for her future life with this guy she was seeing for the first time. He almost spoke up a few times. Almost took a chance. Almost asked her why couldn’t he be in her dream?

_You'll never know the endless nights, the rhyming of the rain,  
or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name_

There is a moment, a flicker of hope. She’s spending the night and he holds her in his arms. It’s nothing but a charade, but for a moment, just a moment he allows himself to believe. To pretend that it’s real. The feeling of hope grows in his chest as she talks about someone from work who she doesn’t think she is good enough for. Maybe just maybe this will be his chance. This is her way of letting him know that he’s not alone with these feelings. But the hope is snuffed out as she mentions another man’s name.

_Pack up and leave everything,  
don’t you see what I can bring_

He’s once again on the sidelines, silently hoping that this relationship will end. He bites his tongue as he sees her changing herself for another guy. Wants desperately to tell her that she doesn’t need to change a thing. That he finds her perfect in her imperfection. That if she would just see what was right in front of her. Instead, he offers her his friendship, his advice, which he is pretty sure she ignores. He tries to push his feelings away to return to the way it used to be. Yet he still holds onto a sliver of hope.

_Can't keep this beating heart at bay_  
Set my midnight sorrow free,  
I will give you all of me

It’s worse at night when he’s alone. He imagines what she is doing. If she’s alone or if Cliff is beside her. He fills another tumbler as he tries to numb himself to the loneliness. He takes a drink as he allows the doubt to creep in. Starts to list his faults. Creates a list of why Cliff is the better man. But all he thinks is that he loves her more. Knows her better. That he may not be the best one, but he could be the right one for her. The glass is empty so he pours another.

_Just leave your lover, leave him for me._  
Leave your lover, leave him for me.  


With the alcohol running through his veins, he drifts off to sleep. He dreams that he finds the courage to share his feelings. That he finally tells her everything in his heart. That her smile lights up her face as she says the words back. She leans forward to kiss him as he jerks awake. For a moment he thinks the dream is real. He scans the room for her. Barely stops himself from calling her name. A dream. Just a dream. She would never leave Cliff for him. He closes his eyes, but sleep eludes him. He feels lost.

_We sit in bars and raise our drinks to growing old  
Oh, I'm in love with you and you will never know,_

He tries to distance himself from her. Of course, that is never a possibility. She chases him down, sadness in her eyes, as she asks what’s wrong. Asks if he’s mad at her. He stutters through an explanation. Tries to say that work has been busy, but she knows it’s a lie. She knows his schedule as well as she knows her own. She turns to leave, but he stops her.   He can’t have her the way he wants, but maybe friendship can be enough. He asks her to join him after work for drinks. With a smile she agrees.

_But if I can't have you I'll walk this life alone  
spare you the rising storms and let the rivers flow_

Drinks after work are more tortuous than expected.   She looks beautiful as always. The words are stuck in his throat. He’s unsure how to complement her without revealing his true feelings. She starts pointing out other women she thinks he should ask out. None shine as brightly as she does. He would much rather spend his life alone then try and fill the spot that belongs to her. She mentions that she’s seeing Cliff later. He orders another round of drinks. She may not be going home with him, but he can keep her by his side a little longer.

_You'll never know the endless nights, the rhyming of the rain  
or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name_

She’s unsteady as they leave. She leans against him, and he wraps his arm gently around her waist. She’s chatting again about Cliff. He chooses not to listen. Instead, he pretends. He aches to turn his head and brush his lips against her forehead. He walks her home. Stops at the stairs in front of her building. Wonders if Cliff is already upstairs waiting. She’s looking at him expectantly and he realizes he has missed everything she has said. He asks her to repeat herself, and she asks if he’s ready for their convention in L.A. He shakes his head.

_Pack up and leave everything,  
don’t you see what I can bring_

She’s asked Cliff to move in with her. He’s certain his heart stopped for a moment. He’s grateful that Cliff didn’t immediately say yes. She’s falling further and further away from him, but not completely lost yet. He wishes he could find the words. Instead, he comforts her. Tells her not to worry that it’s a big step in their relationship. Bites down the desire to tell her that it’s a mistake. She should be with him. The rest of the flight goes without incident. Soon they are in L.A. and his thoughts turn to how to avoid his father.

_Can't keep this beating heart at bay_  
Set my midnight sorrow free,  
I will give you all of me

The trip is nothing like expected. Seeing his father, finding out he had a sister with his name. All with her by his side. Finally, they are returning home. She’s fighting to win Cliff back. Somehow the words he aches to tell her come easily when he disguises them as words to use in her email. She seems happy with his responses. She leaves for water and the plane hits turbulence. He reaches for her and she’s not there. He thinks about never having her beside him again, and knows that he needs act. With a shaky breath, he stands.

_Just leave your lover, leave him for me_  
Leave your lover, leave him for me.  
 _Leave your lover, leave him for me._

He finds her staring at the bottles of water. He doesn’t hear what she says. He takes the bottle and moves it away. Steps forward and presses his lips against hers. He brings his hand up to her face, his thumb against her cheek. He pulls back slightly, giving her chance to stop this. She gives him a tiny nod, which he thinks means to continue. He kisses her again as her arms wrap around his neck. His hand slides down to her bottom, drawing her even closer. The doubts and fears drift away. She is now his. He hopes.


End file.
